REAL STUDENT MINISTRY

Basic Student Ministry Tip #45

2010-08-16T09:11:00.002-04:00

Parents care less about the decisions you make when you are apart from their students, they care about the decisions you make when their children are with you!

Division or Direction?

2010-07-27T06:56:00.007-04:00

I recently had the question asked: "Why do we 'separate' middle school and high school and isn't this a form of division in the church." Below is my response to the question.

As a father of a pre-teen and a youth pastor for almost 18 years I love having my daughter around peers while she is "away" from her parents. For me it is not about the economic status or maturity level of students, but rather about the environment which she is in.

We had an all student ministry beach day about a year ago and an incoming 6th grade girl was dropped off by her father. After parking the car and opening the door the car was surrounded by many students who were excited to "welcome" this new student. In the crowd was a couple shirtless, facial hair sporting high school guys greeting her as well. Her father decided that an "all" event would not be the "best event for her to start with" and took her home.

As a student pastor for many years I was able to instantly able to think of many reasons why he should have left her; relationships, opportunity to build trust, the community that would take place, leader connections for future investments, etc. HOWEVER, as a father, I couldn't think of one. A safe environment that involves building relationships with peers who are in a similar developmental stage physically, mentally and socially is very important. I am not opposed to some ministry events and programs being combined if they are VERY intentional about the why and how to ensure that students needs are being met and it's not just a "kill two birds with one event" approach.

Jesus had 12 that were close, and 3 that seemed to be closer. I don't think we have separate age group ministries for the sake of separation, but to meet students, and adults where they are. We can't give solid food when they are only ready for milk... and visa verse.

Student ministry is difficult. I find it more sustainable, relevant, and healthy when we are able to speak to students and parents about the stage of life they are in and encourage them to make healthy choices in the middle of their everyday life that reflect Jesus.

Basic Student Ministry Tip #44

2010-06-13T23:36:00.003-04:00

If you didn't show up to your ministry event, would there be panicked or prepared leaders?

Basic Student Ministry Tip #43 - Respond, don't react

2010-05-17T10:06:00.004-04:00

When you or the ministry are "accused" of saying, doing or believing something that is contrary to that of your church, and problems are on the horizon, try the follow:

Pray and ask for patience (most of us forget patience and just react)
Get all the facts, not the "hearsay"
Seek counsel from an elder or supervisor and ask them to pray
Speak to the source of the accusation
If it is just a breakdown in communication, clearly explain and move on
If necessary, ask for forgiveness and share the correction you intend to make. Make the "correction" public, this helps communicate clearly the ministries beliefs and direction

ALWAYS address issues that could be harmful to ministry or those that question your ability to lead. Continue to seek God's direction, and the wisdom from those surrounding you who have life experience and a strong relationship with Christ.

Basic Student Ministry Tip #42

2010-04-23T06:47:00.007-04:00

Surround yourself not only with people who celebrate and cheer you on, but also those who challenge you.

Good Theology

2010-04-01T20:30:00.004-04:00

During a recent trip to Portland, Oregon, noted atheist Christopher Hitchens laid down some seriously good theology. Most people recognize Hitchens as the author of the bestselling book God Is Not Great: Why Religion Poisons Everything. Since the book's publication in 2007, Hitchens has toured the country debating a series of religious leaders, including some well-known evangelical thinkers. In Portland he was interviewed by Unitarian minister Marilyn Sewell. The entire transcript of the interview has been posted online. The following exchange took place near the start of the interview:

Sewell: The religion you cite in your book is generally the fundamentalist faith of various kinds. I'm a liberal Christian, and I don't take the stories from the Scripture literally. I don't believe in the doctrine of atonement (that Jesus died for our sins, for example). Do you make any distinction between fundamentalist faith and liberal religion?

Hitchens: I would say that if you don't believe that Jesus of Nazareth was the Christ and Messiah, and that he rose again from the dead and by his sacrifice our sins are forgiven, you're really not in any meaningful sense a Christian.

Sewell wanted no part of that discussion so her next words are, "Let me go someplace else."

This little snippet demonstrates an important point about religious "God-talk." You can call yourself anything you like, but if you don't believe that Jesus is the Son of God who died on the cross for our sins and then rose from the dead, you are not "in any meaningful sense" a Christian.

Talk about nailing it.

In one of the delicious ironies of our time, an outspoken atheist grasps the central tenet of Christianity better than many Christians do. What you believe about Jesus Christ really does make a difference.

Excerpt from PreachingToday.com

Basic Student Ministry Tip #41 - Pride

2010-03-03T22:34:00.002-05:00

Take pride in your ministry, don't be prideful because of it. If you aren't finding fulfillment in what God has called you to do, maybe it's your pride not your position that is causing the frustration.

Basic Student Ministry Tip #40 - Scripture and Prayer

2010-02-22T23:40:00.003-05:00

One scripture reference that is prayerfully considered is better than five verses that I just pull out to fill space. It's not how many, it's how prayerfully!

Basic Student Ministry Tip #39 - Love

2010-02-21T21:52:00.002-05:00

If I have the best idea, blog, video, marketing team, facilities, and leaders around me but have not love, I gain and am nothing! 1 Corinthians 13

Remember that a relational student ministry will always outlast, outpace and outgrow a student ministry that is exclusively built on "cue sheets" and programs. Take time to love your students and the families God has entrusted to you.

Basic Student Ministry Tip #38 - Prioritize

2010-01-28T21:58:00.005-05:00

Surround yourself with people who can help you discern what is a good investment of your time and those things that will just consume it.

Basic Student Ministry Tip #37 - Meetings

2010-01-18T11:42:00.003-05:00

Don't have meetings for the sake of having meetings. Plan your meeting, dare I say it, with an agenda. If your meetings are only "informative" and allows no interaction or input, don't have a meeting... send an email or letter. Those attending our meetings are letting us know that they think what we represent is worth their time and energy, don't convince them otherwise.

Why Don't Some Christian Leaders Just Stay Quiet?

2010-01-14T08:38:00.002-05:00

This is a link to the 700 Club's Pat Robertson and his one minute seventeen second statement in response to the earthquake in Haiti. To me, this is one more reason for people to hate Christians. I am appalled, embarrassed, angered and frustrated by his comments.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQ4dA6kZsEs&feature=player_embedded

Basic Student Ministry Tip 36 - Direction

2009-12-14T09:10:00.004-05:00

Your commitment to God and the choices you make as a result of that commitment will determine your life and ministry direction.

Christmas Series

2009-12-05T20:32:00.009-05:00

Great banner & Christmas series: The Reindeer's Back In My Front Yard? Now Santa's on the Roof? http://www.thelement.com/orangeave/

The Element
www.thelement.com

Basic Student Ministry Tip 35 - The Right Ministry

2009-12-04T21:35:00.008-05:00

If the ministry you are a part of takes you away from your family more than 2 nights each week, you need to ask yourself if you are focusing on the right ministry?

GREAT VIDEO FOR CHRISTMAS

2009-12-02T21:21:00.001-05:00

I will be using this in our series, "The reindeer's back in my yard and now Santa's on the roof?"

The Living Nativity « Videos « The Skit Guys

Basic Student Ministry Tip 34 - Simple Manger

2009-12-01T22:18:00.005-05:00

If we continue to present Jesus as big, flashy, and cool we might be in danger of overlooking the small, simple, dirty manger this season.

I'm Back

2009-11-30T09:30:00.008-05:00

I just finished a two week break from... well, almost everything that didn't have to do with the ministry I am so fortunate to be a part of at www.discoverychurch.org in Orlando, FL. I am now back and excited to be.

The reason for the short sabbatical was to refuel, refresh and refocus. The last six months of camps, consulting and joining the staff at Discovery with thElement Student Ministry I have been doing a great deal of "pouring" and not enough "filling" through reading and listening to teachings that continually develop and challenge me to grow in my relationship with Christ. I began to fell empty and dry. My hearts desire is that I would allow my heart and life to be filled with the things of God; those things that honor Him, please Him, point to Him... things that make Him famous!

I love Luke 6:45 where it says that out of the overflow of my heart my mouth speaks. I want to always "speak" love, truth, mercy, grace and all that God is, because I choose to fill myself with those things that are pleasing to God.

My prayer is that this blog encourages you, gives you a nugget here or there that will redirect you toward the purpose of Christ and not the purpose of people. I pray that our passion would be deeper than our need for affirmation that we continue to run the race pressing on toward the prize set before us as Hebrews instructs instead of looking for the applause and recognition of men.

Thank you to those of you who have continued to send me emails and phone messages to encourage me to continue posting. I am praying for you, your family and ministry today!

Living for Jesus & loving it!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 33 - Give

2009-11-16T00:27:00.005-05:00

Many of us see a need and do nothing about it and when we do give it’s more superficial than sacrificial. Give of your time, energy, and strength. People, who really need you, need YOU, not your money. Financial giving is necessary and I believe in it whole-heartedly, but I don't believe we can measure financially the impact we can make on another person through the personal sacrifice of ourselves.

Something To Think About

2009-11-07T00:56:00.001-05:00

"We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves." - Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Are you the same person in private that you are in public or do you wear a disguise?

Just A Volunteer

2009-10-31T01:02:00.004-04:00

"The words "Just" and "Volunteer" should NEVER be used in the same sentence. It's because you just volunteer that people get led to Christ every day, and that the people who wonder what God has to offer can find out. So I thank you for "just volunteering" when you don't have to, when an extra hour of sleep is what you really want, yet you drag yourself out of bed to volunteer, Thank you." Trey, College Student

Basic Student Ministry Tip 32 - Rest

2009-10-26T09:37:00.006-04:00

TAKE TIME TO REST:
Weariness is worn as a badge of honor, busyness is touted as a sign of importance, and "I am needed 24-7" is a defense mechanism that produces pseudo significance. - D. Salter

I am still focusing on REST & REFUEL! So many of you "preach" this, but few put it into practice. Spend time with family, friends and those people who energize you today. Believe it or not, life and ministry will continue if you take a break... you're not THAT important, sorry.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 31 - Refuel

2009-10-22T14:03:00.016-04:00

For those who care for the souls of others, you need to find time to refuel your soul. Leaders often discover they are running on low and are trying to grow in their relationship with God from the fumes instead of fuel. If you rely on Sunday to recharge and refuel your spiritual tank, you might want to consider finding another way. Most pastors and church leaders are often pulled in many different directions on Sunday making it a time of intense work rather than refreshing worship.

Take time to talk with your pastor or church leaders to gain wisdom and suggestions on how to make sure you have a time of worship. Daily refueling is necessary, so is having a time each week to worship with a group of people who simply love Jesus and desire to grow.

Top Pick for Music Of The Month

2009-10-19T21:37:00.007-04:00

Filled with passionate songs birthed in the furnace of worship, prayer and intercession, Desperation Band's first studio album is a powerful experience calling the body of Christ to mercy and justice. Light Up The World is a fresh new sound of worship from the Desperation Movement through which thousands of students have taken the Desperation Vow to wholeheartedly follow God. In a special partnership with Heartwork Uganda, this album is dedicated to being a source of mission preparation and funding for the building of orphanages in Uganda.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 30

2009-10-19T09:19:00.006-04:00

Encourage parents to become a part of the youth ministry. By involving parents you:

Allow parents to see students in a positive, Christ-honoring atmosphere designed with their student in mind.
Give students an opportunity to see that their parents aren't "losers" and other people actually enjoy being around them.
Gain support for the ministry from people who have had their driver's license for more than 8 months.
Allow parents to see that their student isn't the only one "dressing that way."
Begin to open doors that allow students and parents to serve together.
Give unspoken but intentional support to the family unit.
Develop relationships and gain wisdom from people who spend everyday loving, caring and raising teens.

Take the time and make the effort to get parents of students involved, it's worth it!

Video Resource

2009-10-16T22:22:00.006-04:00

Something To Think About

2009-10-14T11:10:00.002-04:00

"If you have group of twelve kids who don't understand your illustrations and one of them wants to kill you, you have a youth group just like Jesus." - Mark Yaconelli

Basic Student Ministry Tip 29

2009-10-09T21:39:00.006-04:00

Work on developing person-to-person relationships for the individuals sake. People don't want to feel like another customer or number, they want to know that they matter and are valuable. Take time for people!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 28

2009-10-08T09:35:00.005-04:00

Show love! Love students - all of them, love parents - all of them, love volunteer leaders - all of them, love your community - all of them, love the staff & board you serve with - all of them, love your spouse - I'll assume there's just one, love your family - all of them. LOVE!

John 13:34-35

"Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other."

I Believe

2009-10-05T08:51:00.025-04:00

I recently read an article in which a Sociologist penned that youth pastors "need the kind of job description that allows them to spend lots of time with teenagers-there is absolutely no substitute for spending time with youth and sticking to it for a long time." I agree and disagree with this notion and am choosing to "blog it" to further explain through a series of I BELIEVES.

I BELIEVE:

· Youth leaders need job descriptions that give them direction and help them understand the expectations of their position. I don't believe they need more "free-time" to spend time with students, but intentionally planned and scheduled time.

· There are better uses of a youth leaders job than just spending time with students, keep reading before you jump to conclusions. I believe in ministry through multiplication... investing in adult leaders, which multiplies our ability to connect, multiplies our effectiveness, multiplies our gifts and multiplies our Kingdom building efforts. Spending quality time developing, training and encouraging leaders is one of the best investments we can make. Great resource: Sustainable Youth Ministry by Mark DeVries.

· Spending time with students and families is one of the greatest benefits of being a Youth leader. However, we shouldn't just spend time with students and families to meet a quota. We need to be students of students, asking questions that give us insight into their world and life. Through these interactions we will better understand how to plan, equip and communicate to students and families.

· That youth leaders need "personal and family" times built into their job descriptions. Not to mandate a time of day to spend with their family or on personal development, but to have high accountability in this area. Many youth leaders ignore their own soul and family for the sake of the ministry. Most do this with the best intentions of trying to build the Kingdom; some do it because their job may be at stake if they don't produce the right numbers or office hours. BOTH are wrong and lead to burnout and in many situations the departure of good leaders. Family and personal time are imperative to longevity and health.

I BELIEVE in youth ministry and the local church. I believe that students can lead... now. I believe that Jesus provides and that we need to do our part. I believe!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 27

2009-09-30T16:33:00.005-04:00

It's better to have supporters rather than fans. Fans cheer loud, pat us on the back, make us feel great and follow us as long as we live up to their expectations. Supporters will encourage, give strength and weather the storms of life by our side. A supporter's purpose is far greater than personal gratification.

Excerpt from Sustainable Youth Ministry

2009-09-30T09:27:00.006-04:00

With more than 30 years of youth ministry experience Mark DeVries has provided a valuable tool to anyone who works in the area of youth ministry. In his easy-to-read book, Sustainable Youth Ministry, Mark gives encouragement and tools for developing a youth ministry that will last beyond youth pastors and give health to those involved. The following is an excerpt from chapter 8, Aligning the Heart.

When we have little to no life outside our ministries, we can easily develop unrealistic expectations, thinking that the church should "parent" us, provide a close circle of friends for us, offer worship and teaching stimulating enough that we always "get something out of it." But when we have a life outside work, we approach our imperfect institutions with a peace that can lead to long-term change. When I begin to take myself and my situation too seriously, it helps to remember that, in the animal world, it's the most intelligent creatures that play.

Take time to make new friendships, play and enjoy the life God gives you in and outside the church.

I highly recommend Sustainable Youth Ministry for anyone working or volunteering in youth ministry.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 26

2009-09-24T13:37:00.002-04:00

Communicate in love. Youth leaders often communicate to students and adults sarcastically. Ask a leader or friend that you trust to hold you accountable not only with what you say, but also how you say it. Check out Proverbs 26:18-19.

Top Pick for Music Of The Month

2009-09-21T09:53:00.004-04:00

Music pick of the month, DUTTON. Great worship band from Texas. Check them out at www.duttonband.com.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 25

2009-09-16T08:47:00.007-04:00

Don't allow your frustration to steal your focus. There will always be issues, people and time lines that will "call" for our attention and lead us away from our priorities. Determine the time and effort you can give to an area of frustration, with the help of an accountability partner, and prayerfully take steps to address the areas you can make a difference in. Don't waste your time and energy trying to "fix" issues that you can't.

Maintaining your ministry focus will minimize your ministry frustration!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 24

2009-09-14T09:49:00.006-04:00

Remind yourself everyday that ministry is a marathon, not a sprint. Live, minister and work for the long haul. If you go to fast to soon (or ever) you WILL burn out, it's just a matter of time. When you find yourself in a busy season, make sure to plan some time away at the conclusion of it to refresh, refuel and relax. Take your time and make your ministry matter!

No Bully Zone

2009-09-04T10:26:00.008-04:00

I saw a bully today in action today. I choose to watch and see the effects of the bully rather than engage him and challenge the thoughts behind his actions, which is what I would usually do.

Steve, the bully, was late for the bus and appeared very irritable. As the driver opened the door, he looked at the young child in the front seat and told him with a very serious tone, "move it, that's my seat today... NOW!" The young boy moved without hesitation and Steve took the seat. The bus driver didn't say a word (which is another blog in-it-self) allowing Steve to control the bus and intimidate the students on it.

As leaders of students, how many of us have bullies that control and "run" areas of our ministry by their actions towards leaders, students and programs. How often are we given the opportunity to confront them in a Godly way to hopefully teach them but yet choose to ignore it. There is a time for grace, but there is also a time to teach and challenge the bullies. May God give you strength and discernment to know when and what to use to point the bullies to Jesus.

I will be praying for you... and your bullies!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 23

2009-09-04T09:25:00.003-04:00

Exercise daily! We do a great job of taking care of others; we need to take time to care for our bodies and health. Take time to get out of the office and off your butt. Go walk, run, or whatever it is that you enjoy that will get you're blood pumping. Believe it or not X-Box is NOT considered exercise.

We Are All Hindus... Say What?

2009-08-31T09:18:00.014-04:00

The August 24 & 31, 2009 issue of Newsweek published a short article that caught my attention and has reignited a passion within me to help students and adults understand what it means to be an authentic follower of Jesus Christ and to worship God alone.

The article by Lisa Miller, which and be found on page 70, titled We Are All Hindus Now claims that "we are slowly becoming more like Hindus and less like traditional Christians in the ways we think about God, our selves, each other, and eternity."

A Hindu believes there are many paths to God, Jesus just being one of the ways. Miller goes on to state that according to a 2008 Pew Forum survey, 65 percent of us believe that "many religions can lead to eternal life" - including 37 percent of white evangelicals, the group most likely to believe that salvation is theirs alone. Near the end of the article she records 24 percent of Americans believe in reincarnation, according to a 2008 Harris poll.

My initial response was to question the statistics and to research "where" the surveys were given and how they were worded. Then it hit me, I have witnessed this change of total acceptance and a fear of "judging" others and their beliefs for more than 17 years in youth ministry. There was a day I was praised for teaching Josh McDowell's material Don't Check Your Brains at the Door by parents and students. However, I recently had a family meet with me to express their concern about how that could potentially make someone feel like they might not make it to Heaven if they don't believe Jesus is the Son of God. We are seeing a “Hindu style” religion right now in our schools, homes, teams, and even evangelical churches.

I don't believe it's to late... I don't think it's ever to late. We must begin to teach and explain not only what it means to be a disciple of Jesus and how to worship through great music, but also the apologetics behind act of worship… why we as Christians believe what we believe.

John 14:6 leave's no doubt in my mind that Jesus is the only way to God. This needs to be our starting point, not our only point. We, as Christians, believe it and therefore it's enough to read it and point to it in scripture. We share our faith and now the rest is... well, up to the person to accept it and Holy Spirit to lead or not to lead. If we are to share with people who believe that many paths lead to God and don’t judge how you believe or worship, I don't know how effective we will ever be unless we teach our students how to share their position on faith, not just their faith.

Years ago I was somewhat fearful of teaching Christian apologetics, the sole reason was that I would have to know what I was talking about and have to "defend" it to those that would oppose it. I have learned over the years that it's not a defense of one's belief that makes others want to follow; it's the practice of those beliefs. If I believe Jesus is the Son of God and He came to love, and demonstrated this by His death on the cross, I must ask myself: "how do I sacrificially love?" If I believe that I can look at a person's spiritual fruit and see how they are living, I need to ask others what kind of crop do I produce? If I believe He came for the sick, how do I love those who are lost, broken, naked, hungry and empty? Sharing my life should in essence be sharing my faith. The relationship I have with others should reflect my relationship with Christ. My actions should help defend, define and what I believe and develop a curiosity for what I represent. The smallest spark can ignite a fire.

I would encourage you to check out materials from Group Publishing (www.group.com) and Josh McDowell (www.josh.org) to help in teaching your students how to better explain what it means to follow Jesus.

This is a "base-camp" post, there is a mountain of work and preparation to do, but the steaks and rewards will never be higher. I am praying for you as you begin to lead and live what the Christian life is all about.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 22

2009-08-28T09:10:00.002-04:00

LOVE GOD, LOVE PEOPLE! A simple reminder of a simple truth that makes the most profound impact on your life and the lives of those you come in contact with.

Effective Meetings

2009-08-25T10:55:00.016-04:00

Meetings are important and necessary in building an effective ministry. However, many of us waste valuable time of our leaders and volunteers though ineffective and poorly planned meetings. I hope some of the tips listed will help you plan and facilitate meetings that matter.

1. Meeting preparation:

Should a team help plan and give direction to the meeting or is it one that you plan alone
What do you want to accomplish through the meeting? What is the purpose?
Establish doable goals.
Is this meeting necessary or can you have three conversations to accomplish the goal?

2. Participation:

Check to make sure all "necessary" people can attend the meeting.
Postpone the meeting if key participants are unable to attend.
Give at least two weeks notice of meetings so participants will have time to schedule and RSVP.

3. Distribution of all material:

Mail/email all meeting material out at least 48 hours in advance allowing participants time to read through them.
Contact each participate to make sure they received the materials, don't assume they received them.

4. During the meeting:

Set a positive tone.
Help the group stay focused.
Refer to the material that was distributed before hand.
Involve everyone, don't allow the dominant personalities to control the meeting.
Create specific follow-up actions with deadlines.

5. Post meeting

Email meeting minutes within 24 hours.
Follow-up individually with each member who has ownership of a follow-up us action to offer encouragement, support and accountability.
Debrief the meeting to ensure that you are continuously improving and building successful teams and leadership.

Top Pick for Music Of The Month

2009-08-19T20:56:00.010-04:00

Every month we will be featuring an up-and-coming Christian band to promote and check out. This month we are proud to introduce to you Bellarive from Orlando, FL.

The Best In Youth Ministry!

2009-08-18T22:52:00.001-04:00

Basic Student Ministry Tip 21

2009-08-18T00:03:00.002-04:00

Do EVERYTHING in your ministry with quality. Give attention to detail and find people who will help you project, set and met deadlines. If you stay on top of your ministry it can't weigh you down!

Just A Thought

2009-08-15T08:30:00.001-04:00

Look for the beauty in all of God's creation. Sometimes our standards for beauty cause us to overlook some of the most amazing things in life!

Just A Thought

2009-08-11T15:21:00.001-04:00

When my thoughts are deep my recognition of people's needs tends to become shallow.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 20

2009-08-11T14:58:00.006-04:00

Take advantage of facebook, twitter and other means of social networking to communicate, pray and encourage the students and parents in your ministry. Nothing new here, these are tools many of us forget or refuse to use. Try one for three months; it works!

Fill Er' Up

2009-08-10T08:17:00.015-04:00

When I accepted my first "full-time" ministry position I was very excited and very nervous. I lacked many skills and abilities that come only from experience, but the one thing I had was energy... and a great deal of it.

I was a young full time college student working part-time and now serving as a youth pastor in a small church where "youth pastor" really equated to anything needing to be done. It was during this time period I began to develop poor habits that would eventually lead to my ministry of "self" and not Jesus. Instead of prioritizing my responsibilities, I found that working and studying twenty hours a day would allow me to accomplish all that I felt I needed to do. My priorities were simple; school, job, ministry, friends, church and bringing up the rear was a personal investment in my relationship with Jesus Christ.

More than seventeen years later I still have a list of responsibilities, in fact it’s larger, and I am tempted to go back to those twenty hour days and have. However, I am a little smarter and realize that my first priority must always be the personal investment in my relationship with Jesus Christ.

When I am tired and spent and try to continue to minister, I do so out of the resources and strength of me. I don't have the patience, discernment, grace, love... okay, I lack most of the attributes of Christ. It is only when I take time to retreat, refresh and renew regularly that I am most effective in my ministry and honoring to God.

Take time to "fill er' up" and watch the amazing things God will do through you, not because of you.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 19

2009-08-01T23:12:00.004-04:00

I have been speaking at a great camp, with eight more days to go, and was once again witnessed the amazing ways in which God works. I and so thankful that God allows me to be a part of His ministry, He doesn't need me... He doesn't need you. We are privileged and blessed to be a part of Kingdom building and need to continually thank God that we are! This is as basic and profound as I get. Be thankful you are a part of God's ministry plan.

Random Youth Ministry Questions & Thoughts After 17 Years

2009-07-29T07:02:00.009-04:00

Why do people think youth ministry is a "stepping stone" to real ministry?
How can we stop entertaining and really engage students?
If you "twit" in Twitter what do you do in facebook?
Why do we give our conscious credit when the Holy Spirit deserves it?
Why aren't more youth ministries working with the schools instead of just eating lunch there?
If more people worship and experience closeness to God through music, shouldn't we spend as much time singing as we do listening in church?
Why do we get so dangerously close to the "seat" of judgment?
More churches need multiple pastors who speak... my church (www.discoverychurch.org) does an amazing job at this.
Why are so many churches reaching their region and not their neighbors?
We need more churches to implement "special needs" programs!
If the goal for every great youth pastor becomes writing book and speaking tours, who will lead the daily grind of ministry?
Why can't more pastors sweep the floor?
Why is so hard to communicate the ministry vision, purpose, values and events that we lead?
How come so many pastors and leaders "preach" spiritual health and do nothing to strengthen their own?
Why are youth pastors half the age of lead pastors and does that mean I need to change roles soon?
Why is God's grace so easy to receive and yet so hard to give?

Basic Student Ministry Tip 18

2009-07-24T08:11:00.003-04:00

Fully commit yourself to the awkward conversation.

Often when we approach students, they put up a wall of disinterest at our attempt to build a relationship with them. Whether it's legitimate on their end or if they are simply testing you, fully commit yourself the awkward conversation. It's better to have several conversations that go nowhere than it is to never even try because it feels "too hard" to find a way into their life. Ministry is hard - don't pretend it won't be. So make several, several attempts, never giving up. Eventually you'll find something to talk with them about and follow up with.

And if you need an example, you need only look to the constant invitational nature of God. How many times has He tried to build a relationship with us... only to have us brush Him off?

*Guest Tip by Pastor Tony Myles - to find more on Tony, check out his blog: http://dontcallmeveronica.blogspot.com

Basic Student Ministry Tip 17

2009-07-18T09:06:00.008-04:00

I recently asked a group of adults if they had any ideas and/or tips they would like to pass on to youth leaders that might help their youth ministries. These adults confirmed something I have known for a long time, adults care about students. I'm in the process of reading and reviewing more than 200 comments, emails and messages from people who what to see youth ministry make an impact for Kingdom growth. The response was so passionate and overwhelming that I want to encourage you again to actively search for adults in your church who are looking for opportunities to serve, they are out there!

A great resource to read before you start the "ministry of involvement" in your church, is a book titled The New Breed by Jonathan & Thomas McKee. This book is published by the best youth ministry resource (my opinion) with employees and leaders who have a passion to equip and encourage youth leaders around the world, Group Publishing (www.group.com). Take some time, read the book and see the additional material Group has to offer... then, GO GET YOUR VOLUNTEER LEADERS!

Family Video Using Animoto

2009-07-17T23:48:00.003-04:00

Leadership Skills

2009-07-13T17:25:00.004-04:00

Here is a list of characteristics a successful leader has or is working towards. This is a short list that I picked up from a friend; feel free to add to it in efforts of developing your leadership skills.

Integrity - be honest.
Vision - plan and prepare for good things in the future today.
Trusting - trust others in order to be trusted.
Be Positive - look for the good in people and circumstances.
Compassionate - care for people.
Motivator - encourage and get others excited about being involved.
Commitment - follow through.
Prepare - be ready, for anything.
Flexible - be ready and able to change due to circumstances.
Communicate - share your ministry information with parents, students, leaders, etc.
Brave - be willing to take chances.
Respectful - do to others as you would... you get the point!

As a Christian leader your first priority is to keep your personal relationship with God fresh, pray, read His Word everyday and continually ask for His direction in your life and ministry.

Interact Not Entertain

2009-07-11T08:10:00.003-04:00

I watched a mother at Panera talking on the phone, not to her son. For more than 25 minutes she carried on a very energetic conversation with... someone, while her son ate and sat. His continual attempt to interrupt the phone conversation was met with a hand gesture to stop, stern look and a mouthed non-verbal "wait." The first couple attempts the son made were with a great deal of energy as he saw something that caught his attention and filled his, what must have been about four year old, mind with excitement and wonder. The following attempts were a little less exciting and seemed to come with a great deal of apprehension, almost knowingly aware of the pending response. The final attempts were not even directed toward the mother, but now to an older couple sitting at the table closest to his. The "grandparent" aged couple smiled, pointed and spoke with the small boy; they seemed to be enjoying the interaction as much as the he. Then it happened, the small boy moved from his chair to the edge of the table were this couple sat. He was there for only a few minutes smiling, giggling and enjoying the time when the mother finally reengaged informing him it was time to go. As the small boy left with his mother he waved and said "good-bye" at least three times to the strangers who took an interest in him.

Sharing this story is in no way a knock to the mother or parents who need to work to support their families. This is a wake-up call to those of us who minister to students. How do we engage the students who are right in front of us? How do we take an interest in them? Students who come to our ministries desire someone to interact not entertain him or her.

The little boys response to his mother is much like the responses we will receive from students. How we respond to students will determine how excited they become about the ministry and Jesus. They will either move closer or begin to look for other people and places that take an interest in them.

My prayer for us is that students know we care, not because we teach it, but because we live it!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 16

2009-07-08T22:44:00.010-04:00

When preparing messages, put a team together to help you. This team will help with creativity, developing ideas and series titles. Meet with this team monthly in a fun, creative environment. Plan messages at least three months out so your team can continue to pray and think about the message topics while looking for ways to support the series. When putting a team together, variety is important. Find people with different interest, vocation and backgrounds. This will increase the potential for creating some great messages.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 15

2009-07-03T07:00:00.007-04:00

A great way to save your time and budget is share resources. How to utilize sharing resources among ministries:

While programming for the year make a list of the materials, resources and items that will be needed for your programs and events.
Consider an "all church" mailing that includes a list of items that might be needed throughout the year to help with a ministry program or event. Ask those that receive the mailing to fill in their contact information and check all items that they would allow church ministries to borrow. *Please don't forget to budget for repairs and replacement if something should break.
Connect with other local churches to borrow their resources. We are ALL called to be good stewards, not just our church.
Advance planning gives you enough time to email a list of needs to see if other leaders have any of the items.
Share first; this opens the door for others to be generous with you.
Encourage others ministry leaders to look for ways to share resources.
Return items clean and on time. If you find yourself sharing often, create a team of volunteers who will pick-up and drop-off.

Start sharing and you will begin to start saving!

How Offensive Are You?

2009-06-26T00:04:00.020-04:00

I once heard a speaker tell a group of pastors that if they weren't offending people then they weren't really preaching the gospel.

I am happy to respond to this statement with one of my own. A child coined it back in the 80's on a half hour TV show. His response to the person who just gave him startling, shocking or insane news was, "whatcha talkin bout?" This question was usually directed toward, but not limited to his older brother Willis.

I am always amazed at how many Christian leaders I meet that believe the best way to share Jesus with the "lost and broken" is through a judgmental approach of laying out the list of what we can and cannot do (this list usually involves no coffee in the sanctuary). If these lost and broken people would work on following our list they might someday arrive and be like, or better yet, one of us.

Jesus clearly communicated to all people that in order for us to have a relationship with Him we must love. Love trumps all!

⁷Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. ⁸Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. 1 John 4:7-8

Let's break it down like this; in a Bible quick search you can find the following words and how many times each is mentioned (this may vary depending on translation, NIV was used for the following search):

Correct = 5
Discipline = 12
Rebuke = 33
Encourage = 43
Teach = 236
Love = 258

This tells me that I need to evaluate what my motives, ministry and relationship with Christ is built on. Is it teaching people the right thing at all cost, using our list of rules that has little room for grace? Or is it living a Christ filled life, teaching and speaking truth in love and allowing the Holy Spirit to ministry to a person's heart. We need to continue to remember that we don't change and then come to Jesus. We come to Jesus just as we are and then our lives begin to change through the love, encouragement, teaching, correcting and discipline of the Holy Spirit and people who care that make up the body of Christ.

We are going to offend people and I am sad to say I have many times. However, I never want to become comfortable hurting people, especially brothers and sisters in Christ. I choose to represent my God as a God of love... now where have I heard that before? That's right, directly from God himself (1 John 4:16)!

"You don't have to be offensive to be on the offensive."

Basic Student Ministry Tip 14

2009-06-25T11:17:00.014-04:00

Plan your ministry calendar at least six months in advance. Here are a couple ideas to help with the planning your calendar.

Check the "general church" calendar to make sure you don't schedule an event that would conflict with another ministry.
Invite volunteer leaders and parents to a calendar planning party (have food and have fun).
Confirm with vendors and event locations before putting them on the calendar.
As difficult as it may be, try to put cost, times and locations on you calendar. This will make future planning for families much easier.
Don't worry about cool images and fancy font; make the information easy to read.
Have your calendar proof read by the lead church office manager/secretary, and a volunteer from your ministry to make sure everything looks good.

Remember the saying, "if you fail to plan, you are planning to fail." Plan your ministry and get the information out to the people in your church and community.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 13

2009-06-24T14:24:00.007-04:00

Make sure you have the proper forms and paper work to protect you and your ministry. You also will be able to help a student who is in need of medical attention if you have the correct paper work.

Requiring signed forms from parents/guardians also gives your ministry a "professional" look and will usually help parents know that you care about their child. Take time to have the right forms and you could save yourself a great deal of time and stress.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 12

2009-06-23T20:11:00.004-04:00

Find time to pray. Don't just talk about prayer in your messages to students; really find time to do it. Get quiet, talk and listen to God. This is so very important, yet almost every youth pastor and volunteer I talk to admit that they spend to little time conversing with the Savior they represent. To pray and commune with God Almighty means to better understand what He wants to do through you and more importantly, in you!

Tightening The Budget Belt

2009-06-21T09:18:00.003-04:00

Recently I started driving differently. It all started with a special on one of the major networks. They had a "gas specialist" (I thought that was funny too) who instructed a family for one week on how to drive differently to save money on gas, and they did. When the network checked back for an update three months later, the family actually had an average monthly savings of more than $200.

Some of the tips were simple; when starting stay below 2000 RPM's controlling your starts and stops, put the car in neutral when sitting at a light, don't use the air conditioning when it's not necessary, combine trips, and drive the posted speed limit. These tips have allowed me to save money on gas and become more responsible in how I drive. I am a better steward of my finances because I have been educated and have a greater understanding of how to save.

The same is true when it comes to our ministry budgets and how we steward them (steward = a person who is appointed to manage or look after another persons property or possessions). In order to be good stewards of our ministry and budget we need to know our purpose, vision and priorities. We also need to know where to invest the finances entrusted to us for a maximum impact; this could be for spiritual growth and health, outreach or both. Just like driving, we can keep some of the following tips in mind to keep our spending in check:

Assemble a team of leaders to help determine where and how much to spend.
Spending money on an event or ministry doesn't guarantee it will be effective; sometimes the best programs are the cheapest ones.
What resources can you share with another ministry in the church? Are there other churches in your community you could partner with?
Stay within your allotted budget. Financial planners encourage families not to spend more than they bring in; this is a great way to plan for your ministry expenditures as well.
Keep spending records and meet with a member of your churches finance committee monthly to keep accountability.
When necessary, charge or increase the cost of events that always seem to lose money. It may also be time to "pull the plug" on some events or programs. Talk to your volunteer and leadership team before making these decisions.

I found that making changes in the way I drive have caused some people to get frustrated and impatient with me, this is especially true when slowly accelerating at a stop light in the middle of down town Orlando during rush hour. The same is true of any change you make. Tightening a budget can cause tension and frustrations, be upfront with why and how you plan to implement the change and encourage people to pray for strength in the ministry. Stay the course and follow the plan you create for your ministry budget. I think you will be amazed at how much money you can save.

Lives are not changed because of the finances we have or the size of our budgets, they are changed by the power of the Holy Spirit who still works in spit of the economy!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 11

2009-06-19T23:35:00.006-04:00

When a parent is upset about something that happened while their student was in your care, don't talk or try to defend yourself and the ministry. As hard as it may be, keep your mouth shut and listen! When they are finished "sharing" be honest and direct in addressing their concern. An apology is a great way to cool tempers, love in action!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 10

2009-06-15T23:45:00.004-04:00

Many youth pastors have been accused of mishandling money in their ministries; we don't need anymore added to the list. Here are a couple tips to keep you out of the "money pit" in your ministry:

Have someone else handle the money!
Have volunteer leaders be responsible for all cash.
When counting cash always make sure there are at least two volunteers.
Never let students count or handle money, why put temptation in front of them?
Accountability matters, keep great records.

Do You Have It?

2009-06-14T18:54:00.012-04:00

I watched as students entered the room looking for something. It was a crowed area with students and adult volunteers, but many of the students searched as if they were looking for treasure, with purpose and excitement. Each one ended their search at the same spot, the student pastor. I was surprised at how many students were looking for him, and then I saw… it. It was something that I had seen before and had even experienced in some of the ministries I had the privilege to pastor.

It is something that eludes many pastors and church leaders, and attempts are continuously made to "get" it. It is a connection, passion, interest and expression of loving the ministry God calls you to and sharing that love with people. This student pastor had it, and the students knew it. I saw high-fives, arm hugs, full hugs, small talk, longer conversations, eye contact and much more. It was exciting to witness.

I have many friends who over the years have confessed to not having it and no desire to get it. They have a direction, goal and plans to get there… it only slows them down. They have used student ministry as a "stepping stone" to gain the experience necessary to transition to lead/sr. pastors. Don't get me wrong, I love it when my friends follow the call of God to lead a church and assume the role of lead pastor. However, I do not agree with paying dues and "putting in your time" with students. Many times this hurts a student ministry and undoes much of the good that has taken place. The pain of student ministry transitions and the lack of consistency in this ministry area make parents and students skeptics. Sorry, this is another blog for another time... moving on.

Through the years I have had the privilege to speak with many students at conferences, retreats, and camps about their student pastor. In my opinion (and it doesn't mean much) the majority of the students struggling in church ministries are those that are desperately looking for their student pastor to have it, and they don't. Students are crying out for someone to love, accept, encourage and engage them.

If you don't have it and you love the ministry you have been called to, don't worry there’s hope. The hope you have is in the body of Christ and the gifts that God gives each of us. Begin to surround yourself with people who have the gifts you don't. Look to them for leadership in the it areas, and do what you can to learn from theml.

Don't settle on being a good pastor, be a good student pastor!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 9

2009-06-13T07:22:00.004-04:00

Please don't underestimate the importance of this one. Return phone calls and emails A.S.A.P. Keep a phone journal and track the contacts you make. This is useful for reports and reference when/if necessary. Again, this is simple but very important.

Tip plus: return the calls and emails first that you dread this most, get them out of the way so you can focus on the ministry of the day (some of our best ministry will come from "negative" contacts and how we listen and respond). Try to never finish your day with negative contacts, this way you don't take home frustrations.

Click on the title for a great phone log link.

Motives

2009-06-12T20:02:00.005-04:00

I watched as my neighbor down the road was attempting to move a treadmill into a van by himself. Four different people passed by and watched as he struggled, with no success, to load it. Eventually it dawned on me to walk over (I’m a little slow). As I approached, I asked, "can I give you a hand with that" to which he replied, "no thanks, I'm good." I stood back and continued to watch him as he planned his next move. After another failed attempt I offered my assistance again. He stopped, looked me over and asked, "why?" Without being too proud of how I responded (because this doesn't happen often in my life), I said "you are my neighbor and if I needed help I would want you to offer it to me." This caught him off guard enough to allow me to help him load the treadmill. During this short task I learned that he had received help from a neighbor when moving into his home only to be robbed later by the same person. He shared how he was slow to accept help because of this past incident.

How well do you offer help? The more important question for those of you in ministry is how well do you accept help? Many of us wonder what the motives are of those people offering to volunteer in our ministry area and we are often slow to respond to those people who offer assistance. We remember past incidents where we have been "burned" and the pain from those situations resurface. We begin to live in fear and rather than trusting God to send His chosen workers for the harvest we turn to our expectations of what a "good" volunteer should look like. By questioning the motives of people, over time we realize our ministry has little to no impact on the Kingdom of Heaven because we have no volunteer support.

I believe God calls us to carefully screen those who minister to our children and students. I believe that we should pray and actively look for people who can plug-in and make a difference in our ministries. I believe in having volunteers take a spiritual gift’s assessment and finding a place for them to serve that will allow them to use their gifts. I believe there are people sitting in your church who are dying to help but don’t know how. I believe that in order for me to trust people I must first put my trust and ministry in the hands of God and let Him lead.

I don't know where you are at in trusting people, but I do know that real ministry can only be accomplished as we invest in people and then turn them loose to carry the Good News to others. Ministry by multiplication.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 8

2009-06-12T13:54:00.003-04:00

If you haven't used ANIMOTO for making slide shows, you might be wasting your time. I use Animoto and would recommend it to anyone working with students who is looking to save money and time. The slide show videos (made from your pictures) are professional and incredibly easy to make. Don't reinvent the wheel, use tools that are available to you. Have fun creating!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 7

2009-06-07T21:45:00.005-04:00

Using video can "mix it up" and help keep your students attention. There are many places to purchase videos; Group Publishing, Sermon Spice, Blue Fish and Youth Specialties are just a few examples. I would encourage you to get a creative team together and make some of your own videos. The cost to make your own videos is very minimal and you can script them to be specific for your topics. Above is an example of a video we filmed for our Jonah series, it took less than thirty minutes to film and edit.

We Still Have Work To Do II

2009-06-06T07:18:00.006-04:00

"Read an article from the New York Times about a high school in Georgia, that still has segregated proms. Guess I've been living with my head in the sand, but thought those times were long gone. You know what the sad thing in this was, and I guess not surprising to me, it wasn't the kids that wanted it that way, it was the parents."

Above is a selection from a friend's blog: http://oldyuthguy.blogspot.com

It's sad, but very true. There are at least a dozen or more schools that I am aware of that have the same policies. What bothers me is that there doesn't seem to be much attention given to these HUGE issues… in the church or media. Also, how many additional schools/communities have the same policies that we aren't even aware of?

I think what really troubles me is the "us/them" mentality that exists, not just in our communities and schools, but also within the church. We can't believe that schools and communities would allow such a thing to continue, but if we really look at the church, we are guilty of the same thing only on a MUCH larger scale! I am talking about the Christian/sinner mentality. We have our groups and ministries that feel good when we are all "on the same page" but when people come in and don't "play by the rules" we don't like it. It's easier to be kind, smile and say "hi" to our neighbor rather than really loving, caring for them and inviting them in.

Who are we to care for? I believe the simple, yet profound lyrics of a children's song reminds us of who we are to love, reach and minister to; "red and yellow, black and white they are precious in His sight..." I not only pray we become color blind, but also that we clearly see the eternal impact we are making. Are we producing or preventing Kingdom growth?

Christians are not just causing hurt feelings and refusing to let someone attend a one-time event (like Prom), but actually impacting lives for eternity! Mark's blog stated "we still have work to do" and I couldn't agree more, I just think the way should be lead by the church not the PTA!

Great Post By Walt Mueller

2009-06-04T14:10:00.006-04:00

Take a look at this very insightful post from the founder of Center for Parent/Youth Understanding and former neighbor of Jon and Kate plus 8.

http://learningmylines.blogspot.com/2009/06/jon-kate-too-late.html

Basic Student Ministry Tip 6

2009-06-02T09:31:00.008-04:00

NEVER STOP LEARNING!

- Get into God's Word everyday.

- Read as many books as you can.

- Listen to leadership CD's and online messages.

- Get a mentor.

- Search online for blogs or sites that will challenge you.

- Visit other ministries and take notes.

- Visit other ministries to refresh (leave the note book at home).

- Look for local and national conferences to attend.

- Get some good magazine subscriptions (Group and Youth Worker top my list).

- Connect with peers in your community.

Don't just limit yourself to Christian resources; some very helpful resources to me over the years have been secular leadership books and conferences.

Do You Have A Sign?

2009-05-31T23:04:00.004-04:00

Information, information, information! Three words that will make a profound difference in your ministry and how people "buzz" about it. Ministries that are effective in growth both relationally and numerically seem to have cornered the market on informing people about their purpose, vision and in just about every area of the church that they want people to connect.

I was once told about the KISS acronym; keep it simple stupid. I agree with the concept of keeping information simple, but I also believe in giving as much information as possible in as many ways you can to communicate to a larger audience.

Many leaders I speak with believe there should be a "sample" or a "teaser" without giving away the "answer" or entire story to peak the curiosity of the audience they are trying to reach. I believe that this is a major disservice to the ministries we wish to promote. I believe in giving information in abundance, I was hoping to fit the word abundance in a post somewhere.

I recall registering for a seminar that was going to help me grow as a minister and person. The speaker was a nationally know leader and I was excited to attend and soak in all that God was going to say through this person. The promotion information I received listed what the conference would include: general sessions, meals, small groups, materials and parking. I registered with a group of people thinking the price was higher than we would like to pay but this conference was going to transform us as leaders and people. A couple months before the conference we booked our hotel and confirmed our registration at the conference. We were set! The day of the conference we arrived at the convention center to find that the venue had been changed more than a month earlier. We traveled to the new location (now more than twenty miles from our hotel) to discover additional conference "changes" that included parking fees, meals were no longer included and the conference would no longer include small groups due to the lack of space in the new location… did I mention ALL of the changes we posted on a sign outside the main entrance? Needless to say there were some leaders, not just from our team, very upset at the change and additional cost. The leaders of the conference explained the situation, which was beyond their control, before the first session. Their demeanor, tone and words were very sincere and aploigenic. Many people understood the reason for a change in venue, but what people didn’t understand was that more than a month before the conference the directors were made aware of the change and failed to contact many of the groups attending.

This is a VERY extreme case of failure to give information, however there are people in your church who may feel the same way every time a ministry is promoting another event. They agree to support it only to find little to no information about it and no one place to get answers, things change (sometimes for good reasons) and updates are not posted, or the information given is a "sample" or "teaser" to entice them to look for more. If you want people to support your ministry along with its events and programs, GIVE THEM INFORMATION! If your program is worth promoting, promote it well and trust that people will give their support because of its quality, focus and information you have provided. Update changes and have contact information to assist people with "general" questions. People don't want a last minute sign to tell them of changes, they want us to be prepared.

Keep people informed and you keep people happy!

Basic Student Ministry Tip 5

2009-05-28T09:56:00.010-04:00

Get your students out and away from your church campus and watch them grow. If you have a small group you have an awesome opportunity to take them all at the same time. If you have a larger group, take them in small groups, ministry teams, etc.

Contact local business and ask about "slow-times" and get a deal. You could also plan a free day trip, like a video scavenger hunt at the mall (call to set this up ahead) or Frisbee golf at a local park.

Get your students out together and relationships strengthen and grow, for all involved!

How Professional Are You?

2009-05-27T08:57:00.006-04:00

I hung up the phone feeling hurt, discouraged and a little bitter. I have many friends who over the years have made a transition from youth pastor to lead pastor and have had the difficult job of hiring staff. The phone call I received was from a friend and pastor who had just fired his youth pastor of two years. My friend was hurt and seeking advice on how to communicate the news to families in the church and what steps to take next in filling a much needed ministry position.

The reason for the dismissal (a nice way to say firing) was legitimate and long overdue. Our phone conversation did not focus on the youth pastor but rather the "position" of a youth pastor and how can a church layout some basic expectations and then have an accountability process. We shared together how many people wonder what youth pastors do all day, why they need to be full time and can we really trust them with our children? These are all common and all to often unanswered concerns and questions in the church today.

This past year I attended a youth conference where the following questions were asked, "how many of you have been in trouble in the last year?" "How many of you have been in trouble in the last month?" Then the M.C. asked, "how many of you are always in trouble and you will be called into the Pastor's office when you get back from this conference?" I was surprised at the response. People were cheering and standing up "fist pumping" letting others know around them that they were in this category. Many people were smiling, however they were not smiles of joy but rather uncomfortable ones representing those of us who didn't know how to respond any other way.

Later I shared with the group that came with me how embarrassed and troubled I was at the response. I shared with them that I would never cheer or get excited over the fact that I was a "rule breaker" or some "rebel" in my church. I want leadership and parents to trust me. I want a boss/pastor to be on "my side" and be supportive because I think before I act. I don't want to be friends with teenage students, I want to be an example of what a Christ follower is. I want to show respect for time, buildings and people.

How do you represent the "image" of a youth pastor? Are others blessed or frustrated by your ministry? Without respect and trust you can only lead others so far. Read the following and begin to ask yourself how you can grow as a leader and pastor to students, the greatest ministry position in the church!

Have works hours. Let the security and your boss know your weekly schedule and keep it consistent. This allows the staff and families in your church to know when it is best to contact you and when you are available. I used to give a detailed schedule of my hours and I was surprised at how many people respected my study and family times. Schedules are not the enemy!
Be the first one in the office. Do this at least once a week. You will be amazed at how much more you will accomplish in the early hours (between 6:00-8:00AM) when nobody else is around. Coming in anytime after 8:30AM is too late. You are not in college anymore, get up and get ready for the day. If you are coming in later due to ministry or personal responsibilities, let the office know.
Be organized. This doesn't mean clean and neat, it means you know how to effectively plan, communicate, schedule and implement events and the day-to-day ministry you lead. There are many resources available to help you in this area, ask others what they use. The Franklin planner and Palm are still my favorite.
Dress like you care. I see youth pastors who work in great churches who couldn't get hired anywhere else because of the way they dress. There are days you can dress casually, but if you are meeting with parents, leadership, or people in the community you should plan what you wear to match your audience. Most days I was in jeans and Polo's but I also wore shorts, t-shirts and even suits (when required). At least give the appearance that you care and respect your audience. You might not like to dress outside your comfort zone, but we are always telling students "it's not about our rights it's about how we represent Christ." Don't stop the Message from reaching someone because "this is who I am and I don't want to change" (I have heard this more than I would like to remember).
Return calls and emails. Schedule at least an hour everyday to return calls and emails. Use your discernment in this area. There will be people who will contact you many times a week just looking for conversation or conflict, respond to these with a note and it may save you an hour on the phone. You will also want to prioritize your contacts, calling back a parent with a question about an upcoming trip is more important then calling a local vendor back who "has a deal" for your ministry.
Return on time. Big one! I have an unwritten policy that many of my leaders have learned over the years; upon returning from an event or trip, I would rather wait for parents than have the parents wait for us. There are times this is unavoidable and parents understand this. What parents don't and shouldn't have to understand is the youth ministry returning late after every event that takes them off campus.
Meet with leaders one-on-one. Find the leaders that others will follow and spend extra time with them. Invest in them, encourage and support them so they begin to see themselves as leaders, not just volunteers. This is a big step in advancing the ministry and allowing others to begin supporting and multiplying the ministry in a more productive way.

This is a very short list to get the ball rolling for your professional ministry life. I am not sure who originally said it, but I try to daily incorporate the saying "if you fail to plan you are planning to fail." Plan your hours, days, calls, events, study time and ministry so that you can be the best steward of what God has blessed you with. I am praying for you as plan your days ahead!

By the way, my pastor friend and his new youth pastor are doing great.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 4

2009-05-26T22:19:00.005-04:00

Take time to mail notes and letters to encourage your volunteer leaders. Emails and phone calls are great but there is still something cool about getting mail that's not a bill. Don't forget birthdays!

Guilty Until Proven Innocent

2009-05-25T09:41:00.007-04:00

Those of us in leadership have incredible responsibilities to the people we lead and serve. The manner in which we lead will encourage others to see more of Jesus or more of us. We need to be constantly reminded to extend grace, forgiveness and love.

I am sad to let you know that the title of this post, Guilty Until Proven Innocent, began many years ago from conversations and watching leadership respond to problems in the church or community. The pastors and "leaders" who were suppose to look most like Jesus and reflect His love, patience, mercy, kindness and grace began to look more like Judge Wapner casting a verdict on anything that was contrary to what the Church believed.

The simple fact is that the church will experience problems and will need to deal with them, but seldom will we ever have all the facts and an unbiased group to determine what is the correct course of action. We are so often reactive to problems that we feel the urgency to respond, more from necessity rather than restoration. However, to be proactive would mean actually taking the time to brainstorm problems along with worse case scenarios and then prayerfully draft a Biblical action plan to allow forgiveness, reconciliation, and restoration. Leadership that deals with problems "on the fly" usually will receive a great deal of criticism or potentially lose people because of the case-by-case way of dealing with issues that arise. Children, youth and adults like to know what is expected and what the consequences are to actions that are inappropriate or harmful to others.

I understand that not every issue can be covered with policies or procedures due to the severity. It is during these situations that we need to gather as much information as possible, ask the Lord for guidance, and proceed with the goal of moving all involved closer to Christ.

Discipline is always difficult, but necessary for growth and development.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 3

2009-05-24T21:50:00.010-04:00

Email your volunteer leaders, pastor, and staff at least once a week with a rundown of programs, events and what's happening in your ministry area. I would also include a Cue Sheet of the main service including the message, music, announcements, small group questions, etc. Make your emails informative and ALWAYS encourage your volunteer leaders at the conclusion!

When to Promote Students

2009-05-22T09:05:00.003-04:00

Over the years this has been a topic of many time consuming conversations that really has little to do with building the Kingdom. I understand that it is very important to do everything you can to make transitions smooth and easy, but don't let "secondary" issues take time away from our primary purpose, to reach the lost and equip the committed to continue growing in their relationship with Jesus Christ. After saying that, I do believe it is important to establish a transition time that is best for your ministry. I am going to bullet some ideas of when to consider transitioning and why. When I reference transitions, my focus is the children moving into the youth ministry, the Jr/middle school students moving to high school and the high school seniors moving to the college or adult ministry of the church. Please note: I am pro-fall transition but you need to determine what works best for your ministry area.

Transition when you are at your strongest. Many student ministries "slow down" with weekly programs in the summer and spend time at camps, lakes, pool parties and fun summer activities. While these are fun to include "new" incoming ninth grade students to, they can also be intimidating because they usually are off site and have a lower attendance than school year activities.
Summer camps (unless you run your own) will usually require incoming ninth grade students to attend the camp from the grade they just finished. It's hard for an incoming ninth grade student to attend a pool party on Friday with a high school group and then head out to Jr High camp on Monday.
Think of your high school seniors. Allow them to finish strong over the summer and enjoy activities with the students they have spent a great deal of time with. Incoming students tend to be very immature and initially will annoy many of the high school students with their actions just wanting to fit in (ninth grade guys rule in this area).
Don't transition to "grow" your Jr/High school ministry. This is one of the biggest myths in student ministry. Many students "finishing" their time in a ministry area will often fade out near the "end" due to time commitment, job, friends, apathy, redundancy, and more. A healthy student ministry is one with vision, purpose, good leaders, and is focused and centered on Jesus Christ. Students who came to past programs (in a different ministry area) won't necessarily move to the next ministry area because "the church tells them too."
Fall vs. summer transition. The summer is a time when many families travel, camp, take summer vacation, spend time with families and "take a break" from the routine and hectic pace of life. Students continually say when invited to an event, "I don't know I'm going to see who's coming." They want to know they will have a friend to connect with. Students attending an event for the first time as an incoming student is likely to have a bad experience and a poor image of the ministry if they have no friends who attend (remember, summer is when many families are hit-and-miss at church related ministries). Fall is a time when routines and patterns are established: school, band, sports, extra-curricular, weekend schedules, work, study, etc. Provide a strong start in the fall and promote heavy over the summer and families will make plans to include your ministry in their busy schedule.
Streamline. It is much easier on the families attending the church to have ONE transition date to remember. Those of us in ministry have the day-to-day focus of what is happening in the life of the church; we know what's going on. Believe it or not, many families attending our church have little time to "memorize" what the church calendar looks like. One date allows families to focus on ONE date, making their life just a little easier.
Include non-staff parents. This seems like a no-brainer, but I am surprised at how few churches actually do this. When planning transitions, solicit that input and opinion of parents in your ministry. Do this through phones calls, letters, email, or even a simple one-question survey: would your family prefer to transition students in June or September? This is also a great way to help families feel that they are part of the process.

Every time you move and transition students, it's a process. Some of the best-promoted and planned transitions are still bumpy. Just because you plan doesn't mean it will proceed the way you want. All change, even good, takes time.

Whenever you plan to transition, please try to take the following steps:

Mail the information out to ALL families.
Promote and communicate the transition date at least two months out.
The week before the actual promotion have the leadership announce it from the front in every service.
The week of promotion have addition volunteers in the halls and outside the building reminding them of the transition. Have the volunteers trained in where each ministry area is.
Put balloons out. Not necessary, but it draws attention to the fact that something different is happening today. (thanks Pastor Tammy)
Have a leader in the doorway greeting new students and one in their meeting area connecting with them so no student feels alone.
Donuts and/or goodies are always a great way to help students enjoy a transition.

Have fun and may God guide and bless you during your upcoming transition.

Basic Student Ministry Tip 2

2009-05-20T09:24:00.006-04:00

Find the cheapest cell phone you can (prepaid work great for this) and setup a Parent Information Phone line where you leave messages throughout the week about ministry events and programs. The only way this works is to promote the number and update is a frequently as possible. When times are slow; share scripture, prayers and family tips (a good resource would be Family Life, Focus on the Family, CPYU, Planet Wisdom).

The Pain You Can Prevent!

2009-05-19T09:01:00.004-04:00

Tension, conflict, disagreements, manipulation, etc. Sounds like I am describing a secular workplace that is in need of some serious help and intervention. I am actually describing what many church staff will experience in ministry on a weekly basis. More times than not, we create our own problems and "invite" pain into our ministry and life (stay with me).

There is a toll that is taken over a period of time when those people you pray for and reach out to are challenging and questioning your (or one of the staff's) leadership ability. It is a sad fact, but often these are also the people who have been in the church the longest and have "invested" the most. They have a group of people who they will rally and add support to their cause. They might call a special meeting; talk with the pastor or even show up to address the board.

It is during these times that a pastor and staff should have their "ducks in a row" so they have the ability to share the whys and what's that seem to be at the core of the questions and tension. Many times a meeting will resolve some of the tension; “letting it go” or ignoring it never resolves conflict. I have faced many conflicts in the last 16+ years of my ministry and I am happy and feel blessed to say that almost all were resolved with great outcomes because of the directness that our ministry took in confronting and providing information with the individuals or groups.

People who have questions need to be respected, provided with clear answers and loved. Uncertainty while being ignored just raises tension and has the making for major problems down the road. One way to avoid most problems is to be proactive instead of reactive. While preparing for ministry events and programs ask yourself the following:

Have I given all the information necessary to prevent "simple" questions? (who, when, where, what, why, cost, how, deadline, etc.)
Have I given enough time for people to respond?
Do I have a contract in hand for items needed that I am renting or borrowing?
Have I communicated clearly to the parents and given them a contact for questions?
Do I have my volunteer leaders confirmed? It is always a good idea to list the leaders going on trips that are out of town.

ALWAYS have a group of people who can help you plan, promote and proof what you are doing. Please don't use a group of high school or college students, use parents, their children are whom you are trying to reach and connect with. Using parents might mean more constructive criticism and time, but it's worth it!

I don't believe people who have given their life to Jesus Christ intentionally or maliciously attack church staff. I believe they are looking for answers. Give them the information and answers they need before problems arise, by doing this you will find supporters and volunteers for the ministry area you lead.

Great ministries are blessed… they are also envisioned, planned and prepared!

Basic Student Ministry Tip

2009-05-19T08:57:00.007-04:00

When planning a trip with students, always promote the departure time 30 minutes before you would like to leave.

Guest Speakers

2009-05-14T09:04:00.003-04:00

If you are planning a camp, retreat, special service or anything that involves a guest speaker consider the following.

Budget for the event. It was a good idea to put on the calendar and promote, so it's also a good idea to budget for it. We all want cheap and free, but often you get what you pay for. My mother is a garage sale "pro" and I learned over the years of going with her that most people walk right by the "free" box to get to the dime and quarter box. If the event is worth having a guest speaker, it's worth charging for it. Most events that cost usually mean "better" quality to those people who consider attending.
Have an agenda. Before the actual event prepare what you would like from the speaker. This could include the topic, message time, any counseling with adults or students, meals, "down" times, tentative cue sheets for service, prayer times, transportation details, and additional information that will help your event.
Speaker Information. Get information on your speaker. If you can't get basic information from a website or bio sheet, send a Q&A sheet to your speaker asking him or her to return it to you at least 30 days before printed material is due. This will help in promotion and allow you to introduce the speaker without notes. An introduction without notes can help remove barriers between the audience and speaker because you appear to have a relationship with the speaker.
Keep in contact with the speaker. This is your event; you need to be the one making the calls. Emails are great, but feel free to call and ask them to contact you at their convince. This is an area that is often neglected. Don't drop the ball, stay in contact with your speaker.
Housing. If your speaker does not live in the area, provide housing for them. Depending on the event and the relationship you have with the speaker it could range from a nice hotel to a spare bedroom at your home. If the event is more than a day or two, you will need to also consider providing them a place to study and prepare for the next message (hotels work best for this). Providing a comfortable place to stay can make all the difference in the world to a speaker and their readiness to return. This is a great time to use those people who God has given the gift of hospitality.
Mileage. This falls under the first point, but I want to emphasize how important it is to cover cost that many consider part of the compensation. Find out what mileage your church or area churches provide and do likewise for your speaker. Don't just pay for gas, this does not include the wear and tear on a vehicle.
Extra. When speakers would come to our events we would always send flowers or a gift card and a note to their spouse thanking them for sharing their spouse with us. This was a small jester, but ALWAYS received much appreciation and praise.

This is not a complete list, it's an aid to start you processing and planning for your next event that includes an outside speaker. I understand that it is always cheaper not hiring speakers or to just use a local person for events. One major benefit of a speaker is that you can focus on the event and not worry about the message. When using a local speaker there seems to be a fear of "losing" students to another ministry (I have heard this dozens of times from youth pastors and church leaders). Consider a guest speaker for your next ministry event. With proper planning and preparation, you won't be disappointed!

Praying for Student Ministries!

The Idiot, the forgiven, the reliance!

2009-05-12T09:09:00.003-04:00

"Parents, they are clueless, if they would just listen to my advice then their relationship with their teenage student would be awesome." One of many journal entries in 1993 that made me sound like, well, an idiot! Looking back I can't believe the arrogance and "know-it-all" attitude I had as I was starting out in youth ministry.

I had some wonderful ideas of how to work with students and had great relationships with them. I didn't like their parents very much; they were the "enemy" and something I had to deal with if I wanted to continue in youth ministry.

I remember the many times I thought I could teach parents how to parent. I spent weeks with students on trips, retreats, camps, and more. To me, this time and title made me a professional. Every parent should seek my wisdom (of almost twelve months) and incorporate my ideas and techniques. I was an Idiot!

It took almost six years for me to come to an understanding that youth ministry was about ministering to the family not just the student. I started to look for opportunities to listen to parents not lecture them. I spent hours eating, sharing and praying for parents as they opened their hearts and shared what they were experiencing with their child. I heard many times the indirect accusation of the lack of support from the church and it's ministries. My heart began to soften and then break. I was guilty of not encouraging and supporting parents in the most difficult time of raising their children. I asked God to forgive me and guide me in my next steps. I felt lead to ask for "general" forgiveness from every parent I spoke with who was struggling. Every retreat, camp and service I was invited to speak at would involve me sharing with parents and asking for forgiveness for the church and youth ministries that were not ministering to the family as a whole. My ministry and opportunities changed and I grew as a pastor and a parent. I had been forgiven.

The last ten-plus years of my ministry have been an attempt to partner with families and the ministry they must have. More than 85% of all our volunteer leaders are now parents of teenagers. We realize families, parents and students are busy, but we also realize that the "cool" college students don't understand teenagers; they are one or will compete with them (and most college students don't enjoy being "shown-up" by teenagers). Parents are aware of the constant mood swings and the need every student has to find themselves and push the boundaries. Without going into a great amount of detail we ask all volunteer leaders to serve in one area of weekly, bi-weekly or monthly. We also recognize the desire of some students to not have parents serve in their ministry area (we may only have 25-30% of parents serve during the year). To support parents we have offered Parent Coffee Houses with professional family counselors facilitating, one-day parent retreats, semester classes for parents, house groups, seminars, student-parent retreats, purity retreats (parent and student), family mission trips, family amusement park trips, and such.

My ministry really began to bear fruit when I focused on partnering with parents not making them targets. Your commitment to the teenagers in your ministry can only be as strong as the commitment you make to the parents. If you begin to focus on the family ministry and support parents, you will begin to have supporters and volunteers who really care about the ministry and you!

EXTRA: Group Publishing has the Parent link Newsletter. This is a wonderful resource that EVERY student ministry should provide!

EXTRA, EXTRA: when speaking with parents your best response often will be, "I'm sorry you are going through that, I don't have words to help, but I can pray for you," then PRAY for them at that moment. Follow up with a note and try to find resources that can help. Check our CPYU for additional resources that will encourage and help parents better understand the world their teenagers live in.

Just A Thought

2009-05-09T10:31:00.005-04:00

"What keeps people from Jesus is usually Christians"

Where Does Jesus Fit In?

2009-05-08T09:51:00.007-04:00

I was recently at a youth service that left me wondering why the person speaking ever chose to become a pastor to students? The music was great, the games were the best games I had ever seen (really), and their youth area was amazing. Everything was so impressive, the greeters, concessions, parent information/waiting lounge, skate area, video games, and, well everything... just about. There was one area of the night that made me question what was the motive behind everything they were doing.

As the pastor shared a fifteen-minute message I was taken back at the story he shared and the language he used. There was no mention of God, the Bible or our very reason to gather, Jesus Christ. I was confused and concerned. He approached me after the service and asked me "what did you think?" I paused and prayed, then slowly and carefully choosing my words (which is sometimes difficult for me) I asked him if every service was like this one. He confessed that they did "crank it up a notch" because he knew I would be there, but that usually the services were just the way I had seen.

I don't know if it was my hesitation or look, but he knew there was something I was struggling with. At first I was uneasy bringing up the message, or lack there of. After all, maybe this was a "no Jesus" night, or maybe something had come up preventing him from preparing a message. Everything in me was saying just avoid it, change my facial expression and move on. The next words out of my mouth were "where is Jesus in all of this?" His response shook me to the core. He began to tell me that the good response to their ministry was primary because they didn't "push" Jesus and really just wanted students to connect with each other. He proceeded to share with me, very passionately, how the Bible was not relevant and that they didn't want to spoil a good time by making students feel guilty about decisions they make.

I was at a lost for words, I was angry, frustrated, confused and somewhere deep inside, not totally surprised. We talked for more than five hours carrying our conversation to the local Denny's Diner and finally disagreed to agree. Not the way I wanted to leave it, but I felt I had said enough and maybe even too much. My goal was not to cut or wound a brother, but rather to really ask the question, where does Jesus fit in?

Since the meeting I have been praying daily for that pastor and his ministry. I have also begun to notice in other ministry websites, promotions, and message the "lack" of Jesus. Then it hit me between the eyes, where does Jesus fit in my life. How am I communicating and showing Him? People Magazine wrote about the success of Susan Boyle in their May 4 issue the following, "chalk it up to a weary world eager for uplifting entertainment." The world we live in is not looking for "uplifting entertainment" they are looking for Jesus, they just don't know it. They are looking for acceptance, grace, guidance, mercy, hope and love. Sound familiar?

In your ministry, in your work, in your life, where does Jesus fit in?

Pre-service/event video

2009-05-05T09:04:00.004-04:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLByTnNwico&feature=player_embedded

Mix It Up!

2009-05-03T19:01:00.000-04:00

Have you ever had the feeling that you just don't connect to your students the way you once did. If you have been at the same church or in the same ministry for any amount of time, this is a normal feeling. We "run out" of funny stories and use our best illustrations too often leaving us wondering if we have anything left to keep our students attention.

One way to keep things fresh and exciting is to have different adults and students share their stories. Look, listen and ask others about "life changing" stories they have heard and incorporate them into your student services. Most people are willing to help but apprehensive to speak in public. A great way to ease the nerves of those sharing is to have an “interview” time of sharing. Prepare questions in advance, give them to the person sharing their testimony and have a rehearsal. Have two chairs and a small table in the front during the actual service to make it a little less intimidating. If the person is against speaking in public, ask if they would be comfortable sharing on video.

Often, a personal testimony is exactly what is needed to allow students to see that God is doing amazing things in more than just the youth pastor/leaders life.

How Well Do You Communicate?

2009-04-29T19:12:00.001-04:00

I have a friend in youth ministry who recently had a confrontation with his Pastor/boss (the adjective here is boss). The pastor was cornered by a concerned parent who was feeling like most parents of a teenager... uniformed, confused, frustrated, lost, and looking for answers, any answers!

The student ministry was preparing for a trip that this parents son registered for, put a deposit on and was in process of making final plans to attend when the mother found out through a letter in the mail. The letter informed her of "how excited" the church was that her son would be leaving in three days with other students and leaders for a five-day mission project.

The mother was very upset and remembered talking about the trip with her son and even the youth pastor, but never consented to him going. I will now summarize to keep from boring you with a very lengthy story.

- The son asked the mother to attend the mission trip

- The mother said no because family was visiting from out of state

- The son became upset and talked to the youth pastor

- The youth pastor prayed with the student

- The youth pastor told the student he should do what God was leading him to do

- The son disobeyed his mother and you know the rest

The mother explained the situation to the pastor who then shared his conversation with the youth pastor. The pastor explained some basic principles of communication and he felt the youth pastor feel short in these areas. He asked to have a meeting with the parent, student and youth pastor to clear up the situation and to help prevent future occurrences. The youth pastor refused, became very upset and ultimately was released from his position.

This story is very sad, true and happens more than we would like to admit. I am happy to say that my friend has made restitution with the student, parent and Pastor. He continues to serve in ministry and has chosen to lean and grow from his mistake. He allowed me to post this in hopes that others would not follow the same simple mistake he made, a lack of communication. Good communication to the student, parent and pastor could have saved a great deal of pain to the ministry and families involved.

Good communication to the student would have directed him to honor and obey his parent and then encourage him to really share and express his passion to go on the mission trip. If the parent still says no, support that decision.

Good communication to the parent would have not come in the mail three days before the departure date. There would have been at least four letters/contacts:

A "registration" letter to the parent with details about the trip.
A "Congratulations" letter letting the parent and student know that they (the student) has meet all the requirements and is invited to be a part of the trip team.
An "update" letter informing parents of how the trip preparation is progressing.
A "per-trip check list" letter with what to bring, departure details, emergency contacts while on the trip and the remaining balance for the cost of the trip.
A "post-trip" letter with details and a report of how the trip was.

Good communication to the pastor would have allowed the pastor to defend the youth pastor and address some of the concerns the parent had. Even if the pastor doesn't recall the details he can at least assure the parent that he knows the trips progress is going well and he is not caught of guard. If a pastor or executive is updated about the ministries of the church, they are usually comfortable in directing people to the ministry leader, adding their "vote of confidence" to those with concerns or questions. Note: emails are the best way to keep your boss informed, don't bother them with daily twenty minute updates.

This is a very short post addressing a very big problem (in all ministry areas) that many churches struggle with weekly. Don't let this area fall short in your ministry. If you don't communicate, you may find yourself constantly behind while trying to earn the respect and trust of parents and leaders again and again.

Every youth group should have talent like this!

2009-04-28T09:52:00.001-04:00

11 Year Old Girl Yodels - Watch more Funny Videos

What Does Your Ministry Offer? REALLY!

2009-04-27T09:17:00.001-04:00

After three months into the relocation we are still in the process of looking for a church. We are looking for one where our entire family will grow in our personal relationship with Christ, make connections and build friendships.

Being in full time ministry for more than 16 years we always attended the church where I was on staff. Now that we are starting a new ministry in a new location, we get to choose. To say the least, finding a "church home" has been more difficult than Cindy and I ever could have imagined.

We have been to six churches in twelve weeks, some with thousands of attendees, others with hundreds. Churches with great music and churches that needed to visit the churches with great music so they would know what goals to aim at (this had nothing to do with "style" but rather quality). We have been to churches that greeted us in the parking lot and churches we thought had closed down because there was nobody around to help us, really! We have seen really good children's programs with security and then we have visited churches where anyone could pick-up a baby or child without ever identifying him or herself. We have seen programs (bulletins) with great information about the church and we have received no information at all. There have been churches that greeted us with a smile at an "information" area with answers to the questions we had and there were information counters/desk that were surrounded by regular attendees drinking coffee and sharing their most recent golf scores (needless to say we didn't get any church information but I took two strokes off my game).

I have given you just a few examples of what we have experienced in our search. I also tried to avoid my opinion (with an exception or two) in what I thought was effective and what was not. I think it would also surprise you to know that many ministries that were doing well, in my opinion, where not the mega churches but rather those that were really trying to connect with people.

SO, here they are, the big questions: What does your ministry offer? How do you connect with people? How important do they feel? What steps do you take to communicate your ministry?

People visiting your church for the first time don't care WHAT you call them, you know, first time friend, future sibling in Christ, potential giver, guest, visitor (NO, not that one! They might think they are new or something...). What people are looking for is to feel welcome, comfortable, the opportunity to "look around" and see if what you have is what they need. People visit for a reason, give them a reason to stay!

Which doors of your church do you best welcome people to, the front or the back?

How Contagious Are You?

2009-04-24T10:47:00.001-04:00

In our family we believe in sharing. In fact, we share almost everything, including the common cold and flu. Recently my daughter had the flu, shared it with my son who then passed it on to me. My wife seemed to have been the lucky one and missed the opportunity to stay in bed for 24 hours while moaning and making many trips to the... you get the idea.

As I thought about how easily the flu bug passed through our family it was a great reminder to me about my faith and witness. After recovering from the 24-hour flu, I began to examine my life, motives and witness. What I saw in my life was not always reflective of Jesus. Jesus' life was full of compassion, grace, mercy, truth and integrity (just to mention a few) and people were drawn to that. In fact, many followed Jesus because they couldn't imagine doing anything else after meeting Him. HE WAS CONTAGIOUS!

I want my life to be contagious! I want others to "catch" what I have simply by being in contact with me. My heart's desire is to serve Christ more and reflect all of His attributes.

How contagious are you? Where is your heart and motives today? If you are struggling, confess it to those you have offended and ask for God's forgiveness. May you be contagious to those who you meet and minister to.

How To Make Announcements Fun!

2009-04-23T18:04:00.001-04:00

Announcements always seem to take to long and if you have someone standing up front reading them, chances are good that most of your students (and leaders) are not paying any attention to them.

Have fun with the announcements and get students looking forward to them. Get a video camera (borrow one if you need) and a willing person (students work great because they like to see themselves up front, it is also a great way to have staff involved, I have even used the Manager at Wendy's) and start creating. If you have a computer and are willing to try to edit the video, even better.

If you own an Apple, iMovie is a great beginner application to use. PC users should try Movie Maker, Pinnacle or whatever you have available on your PC. Ask others what they use. If you find someone who has good resources, chances are they enjoy video editing. Ask them if they would help you out every other week for a couple months until you get the hang of it, by then they are usually hooked.

The more creative you are with announcements the better your response to activities and programs. Have fun!

A Fun Day

2009-04-20T19:23:00.001-04:00

When was the last time you had a fun day? A day you totally enjoyed and without a cell phone, blackberry or Franklin Planner (for those of you over fifty), a meeting or prep for that next message. These days are few and far between when you are in ministry. If I were totally honest with you I would share that in 16+ years I think I could count on two hands how many of those days I had. Over the years I have listened to many youth leaders share why they just don't have the time, here is just a sampling.

I am just to busy. Not a big surprise here, I lived off this one. However, I do know that many youth leaders don't know how to budget their time, making us unproductive in many ways. We spend too much time on the projects that we like and not enough time working on the areas we struggle with. Youth leaders also are not know for our ability to ask for help, either because we don't like to share the leadership or because we don't know "how" people can help even if they offer.
I feel guilty about being out of the office for an entire day. WHY? Who do we work for? Yes, we answer to a pastor (if your lucky), a church board or a controlling group of parents who don't appreciate anything you do anyway. Plan your week and let others know your schedule, email it to your boss and whoever answers the phones. This helps with personal accountability and it allows those answering calls to inform people of when you are available. If you don't get out of the office at least one (should be two days) day a week, you will find yourself discouraged, frustrated and always looking for a better position and church. Remember, if the problem follows you it's not the place, it's you!
Youth Ministry is my fun. I almost vomit every time I hear this one, only because I used to say it. If where you are paid to work and do ministry is your only fun, I hope you are single with no kids, family or friends. If this describes you, please get out of ministry. We are called to gather with the body of believers and encourage one another, what kind of example would you be setting if you only spent time with teenagers? If you do have a family, PLEASE spend time with them before they get to old and recognize that their “parent pastor” is there for everyone except their family. Get a hobby, join a league, start exercising, do something that involves you getting away and enjoying life to it's full. Take little steps at first, soon you’ll be a pro at getting out of the office (and you might even enjoy it).

If most pastors and youth leaders are honest, we feel lonely. Not in a physical way, but in an emotional way. We carry information, hurts, and pain for so many with nobody to share it with because we have a trust that should not be broke with people who we care for and minister to. At times, many ministry leaders are on the outside looking in. We look in at the relationships that have been there before us and will be there long after we move on and many people don't want to get to close for the fear of losing a friend when the "next church" calls.

My prayer is that you find someone to share with, find a hobby to have fun with and make some relationship to invest in. SPEND TIME WITH YOUR FAMILY! These are small steps that will allow you to have days of fun and really begin to enjoy life.

Sink Or Swim?

2009-04-19T19:06:00.001-04:00

My family was at Disney's Magic Kingdom yesterday in the play area across from Mickey's house. My son was playing as my daughter and I watched. An understatement would be to say there were "tons" of children in the play area. There were some fun structures for the children to play on and slide down. There was one in particular that caught my attention. It was a small playhouse where children could go inside, look through windows, make pretend food and sit at a table, nothing out of the ordinary. The roof is what held my attention, not the children playing ON the roof, but the parents and grandparents who LET them play on it. After a short time my son and daughter were fixated on the roof too. Children who were able and coordinated were climbing on the roof, running on the roof and jumping off the roof. We watched as three older children landed on three small children causing crying and pain, and we were at the Magic Kingdom of all places!

The interaction that brought this to blog was when a father told his son four times not to climb up on the roof, while his son climbed higher with each request. I watched as a four-five year old blatantly ignored and disrespected his father. When the child reached the roof he realized it was higher than he expected. The small boy moved toward the edge in what looked like a possible attempt to jump. After many failed attempts the boy began to cry and beg his father to get him down. The father looked at his son and said "sink or swim, you got yourself up there after I said not to, now I think you should find a way down." The small boy cried a little louder with a little more passion and the father rescued him from the roof.

In many ways this story parallels some students and adults that we know and work with. They have been asked, pleaded with, and told where and how to avoid some of life's dangers and pitfalls and yet they continue to make decisions that lead them toward the problems, living with constant struggle and pain. There comes a time when we should stop asking the question "sink or swim," and instead "point" to the end results reminding them there is a success or failure ahead and the choice (yes choice) is theirs to make. We need to remind ourselves that when we continuously rescue someone we enable him or her to grow. Real growth hurts; it hurts those going through it, and it causes pain for those of use who have to watch.

My prayer is for growth: for my children, family and friends. The best kind of growth to watch and be a part of comes from those people who have seen and learned from others mistakes and make the choice to swim not sink!

Who Do You Owe?

2009-04-18T08:05:00.001-04:00

I love the book of Philemon! It is short, to the point and reminds me of those people I owe. My favorite verses are 18-19 where Paul is sending Onesimus back to Philemon and writes: "18 If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me. 19 I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand. I will pay it back–not to mention that you owe me your very self."

I enjoy reading this passage because it reminds me of all the people I owe my very self to. I don't live life feeling as if I must repay all of the good people have shown me, but rather I see the investment in me from Christ loving people and I thank God for the blessings! Yes, there have been times people have "Pauled" me and reminded me to help, serve, and give as they did to me. They also have encouraged me to forgive as they forgave me. They have pushed and pleaded with me to simply be more like Jesus.

I realize that the greatest example is when Jesus took my sin, suffered and died for me. He continues to "pay" the cost for me daily and I am reminded that I owe Jesus Christ my very self.

Who do you need to forgive? Who are you investing in? Who do you owe?

What Was I Thinking?

2009-04-17T15:20:00.001-04:00

"What are they thinking" was a common sentence I used... well, thousands of times throughout my first 5 years of ministry. As a youth pastor I was usually the low person on the totem pole (is that still politically correct?) and my opinion never seemed to effect or influence the decisions that were made. I found myself thinking that if only they did it my way (thanks Frank) the results would have been far better and the world would be a nicer place to live. Not once, when disagreeing with another leader, did I consider the fact that they might have put a great deal of effort, thought and time into the ministry they were working on and that they had good reason for doing it the way they thought best.

I didn't consider many things; usually in part because I had a brotherhood of youth pastors to spend time with and gain support for our crazy idea that other ministries in our churches would be better if they all ran like the youth ministry. I forgot that the people leading ministries where there because God had blessed and opened doors for them to be there. I forgot that their desire was Kingdom growth through leading others to Jesus. I forgot that nobody was perfect. I forgot that encouragement; support and lending a hand did more for Kingdom growth than focusing on my selfish wants and nature. I simply forgot!

I continued this way of thinking until a friend and youth pastor of more than 25 years pulled me aside and confronted me about my attitude and the way I looked at other ministries. That was more than ten years ago, but I will never forget the feeling of pain and sorrow it brought to my heart. I repented and confessed to some of the leaders at my church asking for their forgiveness as well as God's.

I would like to tell you that I have never fallen back into that way of thinking, but that would be a lie. I constantly look for the good in ministries so that I don't open the door of judgment. I also find that when I look for the good in ministries it allows me to see how blessed I am to be part of something so much bigger and better than I am.

Looking back all I can say is "WHAT WAS I THINKING?"

Coffee Breaks Good For All

2009-04-16T10:11:00.001-04:00

In ministry, as many other occupations, the hours are never ending and there never seems to be enough time in the week to finish all that needs to be done. Many of us "keep ourselves going" by consuming coffee. I was always told how bad it was for me and that I should "kick the habit" to help keep me healthy. I was happy to find this short article and pass it on to those of you who also drink coffee, not just for the "kick" but also because we enjoy the taste.

Once suspected in a variety of diseases, coffee now has an impressive resume: Mounting evidence suggests that coffee drinkers have a lower risk of developing type 2 diabetes, gallstones, Parkinson's disease, cirrhosis, and certain types of liver, breast and colon cancers.

Better than fruit juice? Hundreds of compounds, including antioxidants, seem to be responsible for coffee's many protective benefits. In a recent Harvard University study, coffee drinkers had a lower risk of dying from cardiovascular causes than nondrinkers. Black coffee is probably even better for you than high-calorie beverages. A Norwegian study found that a typical serving of brewed coffee is richer in antioxidants than a serving of blueberries, raspberries, pineapples, or many fruit juices.

Brain bonus. Coffee might help your mind as much as you body. One study found that sleep-deprived rats were much calmer after simply inhaling roasted coffee beans.

Have a great day and enjoy a good cup of coffee!

Where Does The Time Go?

2009-04-14T10:45:00.001-04:00

Last night my wife and I were looking at pictures of our children when they were first born and in the toddler years. After smiling, laughing and even shedding a couple tears we realized time goes by as fast as our parents & grandparents said it did.

Today I also realized that I have not been keeping up with my blog due to our move to Orlando, new home, school, sports, new ministry and many great family fun nights! I wouldn't trade any of that for... well, anything.

I am excited to let you know that a new ministry which I have been working on will launch May 1, 2009. The ministry, Youth Ministry Consultants Inc. will focus on student ministry in smaller churches who can't afford a youth pastor or to send it's youth volunteers to conferences due to financial restrictions. I hope and pray that you continue to be patient and help us start a "buzz" about the ministry come May.

Thanks for your support and ministry! May you see the many blessings God has given you this day.

Living for Jesus & loving it!

What?

2009-02-18T03:45:00.002-05:00

I am now in Orlando, FL where my wife accepted a position and I am working on getting a youth ministry "business" started (more about that later), speaking to students whenever I get the chance and working on a book. I am amazed at how God works and how He continues to guide and provide for me and my family. There are so many things happening in our lives right now that can only be described as "God things" and I want to give Him ALL the honor!

MORE TO COME...